CBA News & Information Archive

November 1996

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November 28, 1996


The upstart Pranktown Busriders are set to meet the Washington Presidents in this year's Cosmic Universal Series. Prankster Jane Burton is slated to meet President Jimmy Carter in the series opener at LaFayette Park in Washington, D.C. on Thanksgiving Day. Game 2 of the Best of Seven series will be played on November 29, game 3 on November 30, and game 4 on December 1. If additional games are necessary they will be played between December 2 and 4. For game summaries visit the 1996 Cosmic Universal Series Games Plate.

November 24, 1996


As reported here in September, Jack Kerouac has relinquished his field management role with the Dharma Beats so that he can concentrate on being a better fielder and batter. The poet Robert Kelly was named to replace Kerouac as the team's skipper for the 1997 season. In October we reported that the Beats had deactivated several players including catcher Joan Vollmer Adams (Burroughs), pitcher Joyce Glassman Johnson and thirdbase person Stella Sampas Kerouac.

Well now the news is that Johnson and Vollmer will be back and Stella Sampas will be the thirdbase and fielding coach. Apparently Kelly nixed the deactivations of Johnson and Vollmer. And while Kelly was known to have wanted Fielding Dawson for his coach, Jack and his mother Gabrielle (she's the team's owner) insisted Stella get the job. So they struck a deal: Johnson and Vollmer stay, but so would Stella. What might not be apparent is that Jack and his mom were under pressure from John Sampas, Stella's brother. John complained about the way his sister was being treated and threatened to singlehandedly dismember Jack's literary archive unless she got the coaching job.

There's probably more to this than meets our eyes so we'll keep you posted.

For more information on the Kerouac Literary Archive controversey read this article at Bookzen by Gerald Nicosia.

The 1997 Dharma Beat Roster will be published in December.

November 8, 1996


Mario Savio, American-born social activist, died of an apparent heart attack on Wednesday, in Sebastopol, a town fifty miles north of San Francisco, California.

In 1964 at the University of California, Berkeley, Savio led a student protest against the University's ban on political activity. The Free Speech Movement which Savio is identified with, fused with the Civil Rights Movement and the Anti-War Movement to provide the volatile mix that became the counter-culture of the 1960s.

More recently, Savio was a mathematics and critical thinking teacher at Sonoma State University. His political activism never completely subsided. At the end of 1994 he started the Campus Coalitions for Human Rights and Social Justice. Most recently Savio was very actively involved in the fight to defeat California's Proposition 209 which in fact was passed in the General Election of November 5.

News reports indicate that Savio suffered a heart attack during this past weekend and was hospitalized in a coma. He died in the hospital on Wednesday.

In a 1995 interview Savio complained: "There are so many things wrong in the galaxy, you'd be fighting Klingons if you tried to take on every one of them." Nevertheless, he continued to fight against the windmills of social injustice. But now, rest in peace, Mario.

Savio was a cosmic baseball player for nine seasons, all with the Psychedelphia Woodstockings. His official cosmic playing record appears below:

YEAR    TEAM     POS     BA     AB      H     HR    RBI
1983    Woodsox  of     .169    260     44      6     28
1984    Woodsox  dh     .236    216     51      5     23
1985    Woodsox  if     .091     22      2      0      2
1986    Woodsox  if     .279    247     69      4     21
1987    Woodsox  if     .234    248     58      8     27
1993    Woodsox  rf     .233    416     97     11     43
1994    Woodsox  rf     .244    401     98     22     59
1995    Woodsox  rf     .172    641    110     27     77
1996    Woodsox  rf     .279    366    102      2     29

Total 9 Seasons         .224   2817    631     85    309

November 7, 1996


The Ionians have a new owner (Confucius) and a new manager (Oppenheimer). This is the first time the team has been managed by a scientist and not a philosopher. There are eight rookies (4 philosophers and 4 scientists). The outfield is composed completely of philosophers and philosophers continue to dominate the roster. However, the influence of science continues to be a factor as the two rookie pitchers ( Oberth and Tsander) are both scientists, specifically rocket scientists. Geographically, the Europeans (20) and specifically the Germans (10) dominate the roster, with the United States of America (8) falling second. The ancient Greek philosophers which used to dominate the Ionians roster have two representatives ( Archimedes and Thales). Chronologically, this year's team is dominated by 19th and 20th century philosophers and scientists (22). Of the 12 scientists on the team, six were productive in the 20th century.

In addition to the 1997 Ionians Roster, and linked to it, are the cosmic batting and pitching records for the current Ionian veterans.

November 1, 1996


The Official 1997 Paradise Pisces Roster is now available online. The 1997 Pisces include four rookies (Luis Bunuel, Chelsea Clinton, Mary Jo Kopechne, Socrates) and two players called up from other cosmic teams (Marquis de Sade, June Miller). Henry Miller is back for a seventh season as the Pisces' field manager, but he has completely revamped his coaching staff to include two teenagers and a fictional character from the X-Men universe. Links to other information on the World Wide Web for each Pisces player will be found on their individual player plates which can be accessed from the Roster.

November 1, 1996


  • New Memberships Issued: 18

  • Membership Resignations: 0

  • CBA Website Hits: 4,609

  • Most Popular Plate: 1996 Paradise Pisces Roster, 315 hits

  • New Plates Published:
    1997 Bigtopia Barnum Stormers Roster
    June Miller 1997 Cosmic Player Plate
    Luis Bunuel 1997 Cosmic Player Plate
    1996 Underleague Cosmic Series Plate
    Cosmic Player Awards, 1981-1996
    Official Cosmic Team Records, 1981-1996
    Official CBA Chronology, 1981-1996
    Special 15th Anniversary Archive Exhibit [Offline]

    November 1, 1996


    November 1, 1996


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    CBA News & Information Archive- 1996
    Updated: November 28, 1996
    Revised: August 1, 1997
    Copyright © 1996, 1997 by the Cosmic Baseball Association