September 1997 Archive
Cosmic Baseball News Archive
Cosmic Baseball News Index

September 23, 1997
Virgins Draft Violet Hunt

The Vestal Virgins have selected Violet Hunt (1862-1942) for their 1998 roster. Hunt is an infielder with roots in the Victorian age of England. In many ways she is a child of the Pre-Raphaelites. However, because of the dislike between her and Dante Gabriel Rossetti, the Pre-Raphaelite Baseball Club showed no interest in drafting her. The Virgins selected her during the second round. Violet Hunt wrote over 20 books including The Wife of Rossetti (1932), an unreliable biography of Elizabeth Siddal, Rossetti's tortured wife. The story as told by Hunt is about a man's abandonment of a woman. It went through six editions in the United States. Violet Hunt herself was a complex woman of her times who began keeping a diary at age 14. Among her lovers were H.G. Wells, W. Somerset Maugham, and Ford Madox Ford. As a woman, she transcribed the space between Victorian morality codes and the desire to be an erotically free being, independent and in love.

September 19, 1997
Ana´s Nin- Honored Cosmic Player Plate

Ana´s Nin, a cosmic pitcher for 12 seasons (1983-1994) is currently the general manager of the Paradise Pisces. She was also one of the great diarists of the erotic life. She recorded in her diary, begun at age 11, vivid details of the emotional life of a woman possessed of a very intense sexuality. Her lovers included the American writer Henry Miller, psychologist Otto Rank, playwright Antonin Artaud and her own father, Joaquin Nin. CBA honors the great eroticism of Nin with this Honored Cosmic Player plate.

Click Here to visit the Ana´s Nin Honored Cosmic Player Plate.

September 17, 1997
D.H. Lawrence- Honored Cosmic Player Plate

Last Thursday, D.H. Lawrence one of our century's greatest and most erotic writers, would have celebrated his 112th birthday, if he hadn't died in 1930. Lawrence played one season of cosmic baseball, as an outfielder, for the Bhutan Vanguards. He had just under 300 at bats at compiled a batting average of .251, with six homeruns. He retired from cosmic baseball after his first season. In honor of his vision, the Cosmic Baseball Association has published an Honored Cosmic Player Plate. This memorial plate contains his official cosmic record, a brief essay entitled "Men and Women in Love" and a brief list of bibliographic resources and links to other World Wide Web sites about Lawrence.

Click Here to visit the D.H. Lawrence Honored Cosmic Player Plate.

September 15, 1997
Cosmic Game Report: Warriors @ Virgins

The Wonderland Warriors and the Vestal Virgins are running neck and neck for secondplace in the Over League. No one thinks that either team will catch the Dharma Beats. But the Beats have been faltering lately so there's more than a hopeful chance that one of these teams might end up in first place.

If today's game is any indication, then it looks like the hard hitting women are the likely contenders. The Warriors looked soft and mostly helpless in the face of a good pitching performance from Virgin starting pitcher and poet, Sylvia Plath, and an awesome offense that knocked four balls out of the park. Virgin rookie catcher and internet murder victim, Sharon Lopatka, hit two back-to-back homeruns landing for herself the Most Cosmic Player of the game award.

The Warriors look like a team on the verge of collapse; the Virgins look like a team getting ready to make their move. The post season is just a wink away.

Click Here for the Cosmic Game Report

September 14, 1997
Pete Rose Seeks Reinstatement

For the first time since his official banishment from the sport of baseball, Pete Rose is making formal overtures to Major League Baseball (MLB) for his reinstatement. A meeting between Rose's lawyer and a lawyer representing MLB was held around Labor Day. Rose was banned from official baseball in 1989 by the commissioner of MLB, A. Bartlett Giamatti, for gambling. And although the official terms of the banishment do not state that Rose bet on baseball, it was Giamatti's belief that Rose had indeed bet on the game, including games involving the Cincinnati Reds which Rose was managing at the time.

Various newspaper reports suggest that officials inside Major League Baseball are not inclined to reinstate Rose. These unnamed officials indicate that before any serious consideration is given to the issue, Rose would have to admit that he did bet on the game. Rose continues to deny this charge. Further, it is reported that Bud Selig, MLB's defacto commissioner is known to have been supportive of Giamatti's decision to ban Rose.

In order for Pete Rose to land in MLB's Hall of Fame he will have to be removed from the list of banished players. This list has 15 individuals on it and no one has ever been removed from it.

Rose currently owns two restaurants in Florida and has a syndicated radio talk show.

For more information about whether or not Pete Rose bet on the game of baseball, visit our Pete Rose Hall of Fame Controversy plate.

September 7, 1997
Baseball's Designated Hitter Rule

Major League Baseball is again discussing the value of the Designated Hitter Rule used in the AAmerican League. The Rule allows another player to bat for the pitcher. In the American League, a pitcher almost never stands up at the plate to bat.

Some team owners want to rid the game of the designated hitter; the players want to keep it; and fans appear to be ambivalent. The most recent testimony about fan reaction to the designated hitter comes from the Chicago Cubs president Andy MacPhail. "I don't think our fans are the least bit interested in seeing the DH be part of the National League landscape." MacPhail, like other baseball "traditionalists", thinks that when pitchers don't have to bat, the overall strategy available to managers is minimized. Of course the rule was implemented because the baseball powers-that-be believed that fans cared more about offense than strategy.

Bowie Kuhn was commissioner of Major League Baseball when the rule was implemented. He liked the concept, especially in light of the declining offense of the sport at the time. In 1968, the American League batting title went to Red Sox outfielder Carl Yastrezemski who compiled a batting average of .301, the lowest average for a title winner in the modern era.

The International League (Class AAA Minor) first experimented with a variation of the DH during the 1969 season. The American League experimented with the designated hitter starting in 1973. Manager and fan reaction was mostly positive. In 1976, Rule 6.10(b) was made official and permanent. But it only applies to baseball's American League. However, the National League is virtually the only organized baseball league that does not use the designated hitter in its games. Colleges, minor leagues, international baseball associations have all adopted the rule.

The Cosmic Baseball Association discontinued use of the designated hitter starting with the 1997 season. The decision to stop use of the DH was based on a CBA membership referendum. 67% of CBA's members voted to get rid of the DH in cosmic games.

Is the designated hitter rule good for baseball? It depends on what is meant by the expression, "good for baseball." If you are a team owner what's good for baseball is what gets fans to spend money. If you are a player, it's good for baseball if your salary goes up and your career gets extended. If you are a baseball "traditionalist" it's good for baseball if things don't change.

One of the chief arguments against the designated hitter is that it reduces overall game strategy. However, Bill James, a well-respected scholar of baseball has questioned this assumption. James analyzed sacrifice hits and the use of pinch hitters between 1968 and 1983 and concluded that the rule actually increases managerial strategy. It is true, according to James' research, that the overall number of bunts and use of pinch hitters decreased once the DH Rule was imposed. But, James believes the decision to use these strategies became more complex. James writes:

I'm not an advocate of the Designated Hitter Rule; I'm only an advocate of seeing the truth and telling the truth. What the truth comes down to here is a question of in what does strategy reside? Does strategy exist in the act of bunting? If so the Designated Hitter Rule has reduced strategy. But if strategy exists in the decision about when a bunt should be used, then the DH rule has increased the differences of opinion which exist about that question, and thus increased strategy...[the research shows] that there is more of a difference of opinion, not less, in the American League. (The Bill James Historical Baseball Abstract. Villard Books, New York. 1986. Page 260.)

Our opinion about the DH rule is based on an argument of fairness. We believe that it is only fair that the individual who gets to hurl a small orb at speeds nearing 90 or 100 miles per hour at someone, get an opportunity to see what that sensation is like. The pitcher, in the interest of fair play, should also stand at the plate and take the heat. On this basis we advocate the removal of the Designated Hitter from all baseball games, including Major League Baseball's American League.

The Cosmic Baseball Association urges owners, players and fans of the sport to support the revocation of the Designated Hitter Rule.

Your opinions about the Designated Hitter Rule are welcome. You can use the CBA Member/Guest Book to register an opinion or send an Email message to

September 1, 1997
Ionians Draft Marcus Aurelius

The Alphatown Ionians selected the Roman emperor and stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius as their first round draft pick. Marcus is chiefly known for his book of Meditations which express and define a Roman variant of stoicism. The Ionians need two pitchers for next season, so the acquisition of Marcus cuts that need down by half.

Born Marcus Annius Verus on April 26, 121 A.D., his father was a Roman aristocrat. Orphaned early he was adopted by the Roman emperor Aurelius Antoninus (Antoninus the Pious) who's wife, Faustina, was Marcus' aunt. Marcus ascended to the throne when Antoninus died in 161 A.D. His administration was met with a series of natural disasters including floods, earthquakes and plague as well as military campaigns to protect the empire's borders.

Marcus wrote his "Meditations" during the Danubian military campaign against the Marcomanni, a Germanic tribe whom the Romans had been fighting with for more than 100 years. Considered a sincere and honest man, Marcus Aurelius was not a profound philosopher. He is, however, a good example of what Plato had in mind when he wrote about the philosopher-kings. Well-educated, thoughtful and introspective Marcus Aurelius is considered the last of the "five good emperors". Nevertheless, he was also responsible for the systematic and brutal persecution of Christians within the empire. He believed that this new religion would destabilize and subvert the empire.

After 19 years as emperor, Marcus died on March 17, 180 A.D. most likely from the spreading plague (smallpox?). He was succeeded by his ruthless and pathetic son, Commodus.


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CBA News & Information Plate- September 1997 News Archive
Published: September 30, 1997
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